Homesick

yes. i am homesick. homesick for St. George.....homesick for being just at my house at Highland. A year is a long time to not be able to spend as much time as you want in either of those places. There are little things i miss. I miss the rain storms in St. George where the wind is warm..and the lightning lights up the red rock mountains....and the rain drops are warm on your skin and smell like a sugared ocean. I miss the early spring time where there is actually such a season. The green plants, and the perfect weather. I miss knowing everyone around me. I miss being able to live with my kitty princess and falling asleep with her at night, and her happening to come to me while i am crying. i miss actually enjoying swimming. i miss sitting outside getting heatstroke while you try and tan. I miss finding secret ways to sneak in and out of my house . I miss lighting my candles and scrapbooking to my heart's content in my giant bonus room. i miss being in my element and knowing exactly who i was. I miss sleeping on a queen sized mattress. I miss thinking the mall was the coolest place on earth. I miss taking photobooth pictures with jocelyn, at the mall and on our mac's. I miss having my long hair. I miss getting all dolled up everyday for no reason. i miss those kirkland weightloss chocolate shakes. I miss walking on the temple grounds. I miss sleeping in. i miss talking to jocelyn for hours on the phone with jocelyn for no reason at all. I miss crying when i left on a humanitarian trip for a week because i missed jocelyn. I miss calling her on the roof of a hospital in mexico so i could get reception. I miss getting engaged to mexicans named oscar when im only thirteen. I miss spending as much time as i want at the Cluff's house. I miss staying up late and talking with Sarah. I miss playing store with the girls. I miss being rich. I miss being able to sleep with my door open and my fan going. I miss my fan. I miss mirrors and expo markers. I miss having a bigger bedroom with lots of windows. I miss sitting on my roof at night. I miss sneaking out windows onto my roof and around the house to another window when i was being chased. I miss having only one person to live for, and getting my fill of attention. I miss reading my days away and going to the library for fun. I miss reading in the children's section. I miss not having to work. I miss having chores to do (don't tell my mom) I miss having a 0 stress level. I miss being able to hold my tongue. I miss late night walks and my conscience keeping me for toilet papering. I miss not being looked down upon for my age.  I miss the ring my dad made for my mom. I miss the dad i adored. I miss my brother. I miss my three year old sister that listened and believed everything i told her. I miss being able to describe a song and say "it sounded like a flower......or a rose" and get away with it. I miss playing with people's lips when the slept...and then when they get annoyed, snap their eyelids. I miss the tree house that i knocked down when i was possessed. I miss having my own garden. I miss fresh warm peaches straight from the tree. I miss that stupid old coconut my dad tried to grow. I miss my Great Aunt Kathy and uncle Jerry. I miss playing house in my Great Grandpa's basement. I miss watching my kitty sprawl out on the back sliding glass door rug to lay in the sun. I miss making gum out of wheat and peppermint. I miss fresh salsa and fresh jerky. I miss my old giant pantry. I miss Christmas time in my little house when my sister still believed in santa. I miss going to my grandparent's house in corona and going to the beach and disneyland. I miss my black relatives, they are the best:) I miss psych continuously being on. I miss having enough time to shower and not having to choose it over sleep. I miss being in shape. I miss playing celine dion, josh groban, or shania twain really loud and singing along. I miss being able to play the piano. I miss sneakily wearing clear mascara when i wasn't allowed to wear it. I miss believing that Narnia was real. I miss president Hinkley. I miss when Obama wasn't president. I miss gas being like $1.27.

All in all, i miss alot of things. I could go on forever. The point being, it sucks to grow up....and it sucks even worse when everyone says "thats just the way life is" I decided to make a pact that i will never officially grow up. children judge less....AND they have more fun, plus they love more easily, imagine more easily etc. I will be responsibly childish. I will love other people and love myself, and i will create new fond and colorful memories everyday. I will be closer to God. I will be closer to my family, and closer to myself. I haven't been for a long time. I am going to be comfortable in my own skin. Life is to be enjoyed not jut endured. The only sad thing is.....None of you get to have all of the wonderful memories that i have. :) oh well.

If you share one of these memories listed above, feel free to comment:)

-Me